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A twenty something college student struggling to get by. Gamer, reader, always tired and too busy, pansexual, taken, I have PTSD, I'm an artist and I post what I want/like.

The odd thing is, Harry,’ he said softly, ‘that it may not have meant you at all. Sybil’s prophecy could have applied to two wizard boys, born at the end of July that year, both of whom had parents in the Order of the Phoenix, both sets of parents having narrowly escaped Voldemort three times. One, of course was you. The other was Neville Longbottom.


Mom was listening to police scanner. There was a call to Michaels craft store with a man bloodied in the bathroom &the staff didn’t know what to do. Several minutes later they get the guy in ambulance & one of them radios over to dispatch that it’s just minor lacerations to the face due to breakdancing in the bathroom.

Lmao what?why?


So, my friend made herself into 15 foot long cardboard velociraptor with googly eyes


So, my friend made herself into 15 foot long cardboard velociraptor with googly eyes

Outdoor Cafe, Krakow, Poland

Outdoor Cafe, Krakow, Poland

The worst thing about being naked and then being hit by a car is that road rash is a problem for skin.

Why was I naked in the middle of the road at noon? I’m glad you asked, imaginary other half of this conversation! I have no idea. Some characteristics of bipolar disorder include dissociation, hallucinations, and fugue states, so sometimes, I wake up in places I didn’t go to sleep.

Has this ever been a problem? My, you are inquisitive, imaginary conversation partner! And also a bad listener. See aforementioned attempt to befriend a windshield.

So there I am, nude, rolling on the hood of a car screaming about the government conspiracy to take away my feet. Not my real feet, just my brain feet.
I’m about six inches from the concrete when I realize, in slow motion: like the exact opposite of a bank robbery, this… is not how I imagined my life would turn out.

When I was young, I broke both of my ankles because I was sure a cape would enable me to fly. My parents attributed this to my strong imagination. When I did this last year, my therapist called it a delusion. I fail to see the difference.

Also, I really can fly and see the future and make people leave coffee shops with my mind 43% of the time. The point is, here is a list of things my brain has told me to do: join a cult, start a cult, become a cabinet maker, kill myself (so, in essence, become a cabinet maker), break into and then paint other peoples’ houses, have sex with literally everyone who reminds me of my mother, fight people who are much… fightier than me, like the cops (so, in essence, kill myself).

I think a lot about killing myself, not like a point on a map, but rather like a glowing exit sign at a show that’s never been quite bad enough to make me want to leave. See, when I’m up I don’t kill myself because holy shit! there’s so much left to do! And when I’m down, I don’t kill myself because then the sadness would be over and the sadness is the old paint under the new. I’d still be me without it, but I’d be so boring!

When they first told me I had bipolar disorder, I was somehow still surprised like, “You mean not everyone sees demons and feels as though they are covered in insects several times a day?” As it turns out, seeing and feeling things that aren’t technically there is called “disordered cognitive functioning”. I call it “having a fucking superpower”. Sometimes, I see people as colors. This guy right here (gestures to man in audience) is purple, which means he just got a promotion or a blow job. A blowmotion, if you will.

Y’all, sometimes I really can see the future. The future, it looks like a child in a cape. The future looks like gravity. Everyone just wants to be a part of someone else. The future is a small town we’re all gonna move to someday. I saw the future. I did, and in it, I was alive.

My god, I was alive. 



The man’s best friend!

Literally nothing better than the love you receive from a dog.


Imagine if trees gave off wifi signals. We would be planting so many trees and we’d probably save the planet too.

Too bad they only produce the oxygen we breathe











when she says she doesn’t send nudes


when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudesimage

when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia


When Russia sends you nudes










this literally gave me chills.

I’ve never hit the reblog button so fast in my life.




television show idea:

men who relentlessly pursue people with inappropriate messages on ok cupid are forced to read everything they’ve said in front of a live studio audience.

Always reblog the pitch for OK Stupid

I would watch this religiously and hold screening parties for my friends.